W's under the arrogant misconception that as their mother she can do no harm where they are concerned. And she is now, for the third time in less than a year's time, proceeding with changing up their daycare without even prior consultation with me, their father, let alone getting my consent. Just this very morning she left a voicemail on my work phone to tell me she was proceeding with giving the current daycare provider notice of her intended changes -- she did not ask me for my consent.
How do your sons feel about that? You know AS kids, continuity and stability are very important, and it seems your W is kind of doing the opposite. If you go into court, maybe your L could use that in some way; anybody that knows anything about AS will know that's not right. Have you talked to your W about the consistency and stability they need and that 3 changes in less than a year is just too much for them? My dad did that kind of stuff in the years after my mom died, my brother and I would go to 3 schools in a year for about 3 yrs., and it was hard on us. (After he got more together, he apparently regretted it, and wouldn't move around at all after that b/c he realized it wasn't right btw. I think my dad kind of lost it and was messed-up and if your W is like that, maybe she shouldn't be making major decisions without your input...I mean even if she was 100% together, your input should be given in terms of schooling and things like that.
I see your W as being a lot like my H. They are both button-pushers and after knowing us so well, not hard to figure out what they are. When she says stuff like "you think you're God" and comments like you killed the marriage, she is obviously trying to make you mad! My H had a period where he was doing that all the time too. I think they have to be experiencing some guilt over their actions, so when they get us to fight I guess it helps for a time, makes them feel they are justified. My personal take is I refuse to let him push my buttons (well not very often) b/c I refuse to make this easy for H. I want him to experience the full guilt (well as much as he's capable of feeling anyway). Karen
