I wrote an e-mail to my h last week. I told him I forgived him, accepted his decision to end the m, and was letting go.
We spoke briefly the next day regarding some information necessary for the separation agreement that I am preparing. When I asked him then about the divorce, he asked if we could take things in stages, that he had so much going on in his head, and couldn't tell me anything more than he had said before. He was obviously emotional and doesn't seem happy.
I think letting go is important - for us and sometimes for them. I don't know what effect it had or is having on my h, but I do know that I have to follow it through with no contact (except for the rare practical or business matter that arises). He left a voice mail message last night and I replied with a very simple and brief text message.
I am either giving him the gift of missing me and the space to think through his choices, or I am giving him the space to move on completely. Either way, I am focusing on healing myself. When I am ready and if he has not already done so, I will begin the d proceedings. I may also consider more active dbing ("being the more attractive option to ow") when and if I am healed sufficiently to do so without hurting myself unduly and if I still want to at that point. We are all travelling and moving and it is sometimes amazing what time brings to us and them.
