The main lesson, the most important lesson, I've learned from BDing - and from my friends here is that to love in the most generous way is to give without expecting anything in return...It is, without a doubt, the most difficult kind of love to achieve - but the reward can be so spectacular - in that we love while maintaining a sense of ourselves. What I've found over the last few months is that when we love with entanglements and attachments and expectations - we really isolate our "selves" within a mess of dread, desire, want and confusion. But when we love, truly love, by giving and not attaching ourselves to any consequences of our giving - we are free to be whole...That's comforting - but also terrifying - and also so very sad at times...since how could we possibly be whole on our own when words like "you complete me" resonate so soundly in our cultural pantheon of love? Don't we need another to complete us? Romance would suggest it...but love, in reality, says no...we need to be complete in order to love in the healthiest of ways...and that lesson, getting there, feels impossible sometimes since it involves undoing, brick by brick, the very temples we thought were ourselves - and now we're using those bricks to make a better designed, more stable temple..
Beautifully written by Carlos.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
