Bad (expected) news: H and I talked this morning and agreed that we absolutely cannot go on like this. Neither of us is happy for opposite reasons.
*I am unhappy b/c I feel I am pouring my love into a bottomless hole and getting nothing back.
*He feels he has been "trying to get back to US" by living here and spending family time together but his feelings haven't grown to what he wants them to be so he is pissed that it isn't working.
*We BOTH agree that we want to experience real, unconditional, forever love with our spouse. Problem is I don't feel it from him and he says he can't figure out why he doesn't feel it for me anymore even though he claims he wants to??
Good News: In the process of this conversation H kept saying how frustrated he was b/c his life wasn't going how he wanted it to. He was so mad b/c he wanted to be with me but he still couldn't/didn't feel comfortable being close to me like a husband...
I said, "So you hate your life and sometimes think it would be easier to be dead...And you really don't want to talk to someone about this?"
He replied "I already started seeing someone (therapy) again"
I asked about it and he said it was "To try and help me figure out what to do about us and also to FIX ME" His words, not mine, he wants to get 'fixed'. Guess he knows he's broken??
