I ended up texting him, "I'd like to hear that. You can send it to my place in atlanta, XXXXX. Have a good trip!"
So, I ended up meeting with one of the cello teachers today and it honestly was the most humiliating, shaming experience of my life. I knew I wasn't ready and I shouldn't have gone. I feel so foolish... I had been agonizing over whether or not to do these lessons for so long, I should have listened to my intuition and NOT gone to them. Thank God the other cello teacher canceled tomorrow's lesson because she is stuck out of state because of the snow. Luckily I was able to spend the evening processing it with a really good friend. I feel completely retarded because I think part of the reason I chose to do the lessons against my own better judgement was so I'd have an "excuse" to stay in NYC on the off chance that B would ask to see me again. HELLO? I have to stop making decisions this way and start living for my own happiness. It's just like... if I don't do a teaspoon full of scheming, WTF will we ever be in the same friggin' state? I will be relieved to go home tomorrow and spend two nights with my parents before flying back to ATL.
