M, If the talk ever takes place, listen, sift through the BS and validate his feelings about himself, the situation, you and the family. I would never recommend validating the op in this kind of setting. The focus has to be on him and his perceptions at the time.
For now, try to take it easy and take care of yourself. If he comes over, I will be surprised.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
