TRUSTINGS NEW BEGINNINGS

[Cinderellaman]

Dear Trusting,

I just have to tell you that I sent your beautiful post to my H, saying that this is where I am now and what my 2009 will look like.

He wrote back, said..."beautiful, I hope you will have much love and warmth this year and that you have truly gotten to this point."

I casually sent a message back to him saying "Thanks, it's good to finally be able to reach that point and let go of things. I too wish you much love and warmth in 2009!".

Then I kindly asked him to please send me the money for the kid's swimming lessons.

And in a PS...I wrote "Oh and by the way, I've opened a new email account, although the old one will still be active for practical purposes, it's (my name)...at ....hotmail etc."
I opened an email adres on MY name, and the old one had both our names on it...(big step for me !)

So, Trusting, I just wanted to thank you for giving me the push to get to the next level ! I am forever in debt !

Love !!! xxxx

[TRUSTING]

Your very sweet Cinders.

[TRUSTING]

Your very sweet Cinders.

[cagzmom]

Cinders good for you.

I actually used my name recently....and joined facebook (facing old friends has been actually freeing....)

Trusting...i read your earlier post. i know.

[TRUSTING]

My ex's prior secretary called me today.
She wanted to check in with me to see how I was doing. We were close when she worked for my ex.
She told me that ex is losing many clients due to angry outbursts. He seems not to be able to control himself. One of his clients was a very elderly fellow who ex lost his cool with. Ex's old secretary told me he had to go into counseling because he was really affected by how harshly ex came across.
So sad.

She also told me that ex is not telling anyone that we are divorced.

I am remaining very dark. It has helped me so much. I actually feel I could continue my life like this forever.

Hope everyone is doing well.

[cagzmom]

T- the spiral just continues

Doesn't it seem taht dark is better for us? Weird isn't it. Keep growing....

[forward]

You know, Trusting, I don't have any kind of inside track like that, to let me know that all is not paradise. Since H said he was engaged, I have kind of begun to think of letting go and dating and having some fun.

I am just worn out.

[TRUSTING]

Breton,

I do understand, but your H can be nothing but miserable due to all his bad behavior. They are such actors.


Well, I saw my ex today. Of course not planned, but we ran into each other. I had to go to the day care center and pay the bill.
Ex showed up with my youngest. He usually comes much later, so I was very surprised to see him. I have not seen him since October. He did look quite tired and depressed. He seemed so happy to see me. I was all business and did not spend time chit chatting. I really find being dark very healing. Seeing him just makes me remember what he use to be like. My heart just aches all over again. Fortunately I worked today and it was so busy I had no time to think about it.

[cagzmom]

T- that is EXACTLY what happens to me. When I dont see him I am able to see the reality. When I do see him my heart and mind floats around.

I can't believe you were able to not see him for that long! I actually envy you a little-------- how do you stay away with the drop offs for the kids???

Sorry - i just need to be further and further away from him.......

[forward]

Trusting, Just remember to keep it friendly-business-like and not cold or cool.

I was thinking that your situation is most interesting in some respects. Your H has taken great pains to hide the OW and keep her out of certain key parts of his life. When you think about it, that simply cannot continue. He can't fake it forever!