He needs to see for himself the anger and hurt he is causing your son. Remember he is most likely not going to believe what you say. You need to protect and be there for your son, he is old enough to understand most of what is happening. You don't have to go into every detail and please don't talk negative about your H to him. ( I'm sure you know this already) You need to let your H deal with this. He did the damage and your son is hurting so it's extremely tough I know. He needs to step up on his own and I hope he does soon.
You Know your husband better than anyone else. I'm not totally caught up on your whole sitch. So the advice I give will be from my experience with my wife and from reading here on the board.
I have to say it is very well written and you cover many good points without holding much back. I Love your letter, but guess what? I'm not having a MLC. I, like you and others here, are thinking with our rational mind. MLC'ers can't.
Now there are no set rules and everyone is different. If I wrote that to my wife, it would have a negative effect, but Like I said, you know your H the best.
Being in MLC will it all sink in .... my guess is no
Deep down does he know this stuff already.....yes
Will he admit it.....my guess again is no
Will he take a look at himself and change.... Perhaps, but Not until HE is ready.
Nothing you say will make this happen. He is in his own little world right now.
Please don't get me wrong. The letter is great, but true MLC'ers don't have a firm hold on reality while off in la la land and In my opinion it seems like they just can't stand taking a look at themselves, like your letter suggests. They want to run from stuff like this.
You generally have to show them everything, and they will still test you to the max .
I hope and pray that it does have an impact on him. I will catch up on your whole sitch too. Let's wait and see.
