So here is a bit of an interesting tidbit that I would like some opinions on. H emailed me this morning because he is getting his final paperwork together for immigration. He asked me for some information on the paperwork, where I am still convenientily listed as his wife (eyes rolling, yeah its okay to say I am his wife when HE needs something) and wanted to know if I knew of someone who could look over the paperwork. I do know an attorney in the office who worked an immigration clinic, so she agreed to look over the paperwork.
Okay, so I am not his sponsor for citizenship, that is his ex-wife. I asked this attorney, let's call her M, if it was going to make a difference that we are now separated, and explained that I was not his sponsor. She said that INS (or USCIS, as it is now called) might take longer to look through his paperwork because they will want to know WTF is going on that this dumbkoff cannot seem to keep a marriage together, and could ultimately deny the application, although they probably won't.
So I sent this email: I talked to M about this. She said I will need to list the address that I am living at.
She also warned about this…USCIS may take longer to approve your application because they will want more information regarding XW and they can ask why we are separated. She said that her two friends that work in immigration say that they are cracking down on who is approved. Because I am not your sponsor, this should not have an effect on you, but she wanted me to tell you because it could take longer to process your paperwork.
He calls me in a total panic, what does that mean? There is nothing we can do? Do we need to get an attorney for the immigration??? I told him to calm down, that all it meant is that he might have to answer questions about why he divorced XW and why we are S. I agreed that there was nothing we could do, and it just might take a little longer.
It was kind of funny, b/c what I really WANTED to say is DUMBKOFF get your head out of your arse and see that GOD IS TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING...
AHHHHH!!!!!! How can a person who is so smart be so stupid!!!
<~~~ Breathing, eyes closed, hand reaching out...resounding SMACK!!! on the side of the head...
I am thinking he panicked because he thought I was going to tell him it would be better for me to move back into the house so we didn't have to worry about this, and that he could accuse me of using something else to try to get back together with him. This is not the case.
Anyway, input?
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I have to let him do the stressing because frankly, I cannot handle it anymore. I have my own stress, and as much as I do worry about him, I realize that he is the one who wanted this. There are days when I truly believe I have had enough, and that I am done, and then something happens and I realize that I am not. But I also cannot put my life on hold just because I am married to him.
I still want my H, I love him and really believe if he would just give it a chance that we could get through this. But I also realize I cannot force him, and he needs to come to that conclusion on his own.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
LMAO...it is amusing because H wanted to separate the cell bills, and I was so panicked. This is the last joint bill we have, and although it's not like we talk about it, it was a connection. When I lost the phone, I panicked, thinking oh now he is going to really separate that bill.
And then I did something I could not have foreseen. I called him and told him I lost the phone, and since he wanted to take me off hte contract anyway, to just do it and I would get my own phone. And then I did.
I called H yesterday to give him the new number, debating about whether or not I was going to make him wait a few days and then remembered I had his immigration paperwork. He starts complaining that to cancel me off the contract it was going to cost him $200. And I am inwardly laughing a bit because he is complaining about the extra cost, and I am thinking this is what YOU wanted Bud. But, I did offer to pay half because I had, in fact, just purchased a new phone two months ago and he did pay for it and did not ask me for the money back.
I am not sure what has turned over in me, but all of a sudden, I feel really great. It's like this whole thing is not such a big deal anymore. Don't get me wrong, I still love H, and I always will. But on the other hand, I realize that I am sick to death of always worrying about him, what to say, what to do, how to feel. I feel stronger than I have before, even after a total meltdown on Monday. One way or the other, I am going to get to the end of this, and honestly, I feel relieved!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
((((Jeffy Poo))))) and detachment is a really good thing!!!!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
