W is the baby too, with 2 older brothers. We joked early in our courtship that we should just run from each other once we found out we were both babies.
Yeah my older sisters well they babied me and watched that I didn't get into trouble. They gave me the condom use lecture too , so I was using those things before it was even cool (70's). That BTW was W and my preferred method of birth control once she quit the pill (after D16's birth she decided not to go back on it).
The vas is something we had talked about for about 8 years prior. It was my idea because we were both age 40 and knew we should no longer try to have any more children for her health reasons. The final straw was W's high blood pressure, plus I was really tired of using condoms.
I know all of the miscarriages didn't help things. You do feel the loss very much but I can't imagine the pain of losing an infant or a full grown child as you did Jayce. W's brother died at age 55 from a stroke but it took him over a year before his death because he had a series of diabetic strokes. So I saw what W's mom went through, very tragic.
You may have read the post were I talked about how we view our only daughter as a miracle. W & I have shared this many times with each other.
You be glad to know I'm almost finished reading M/V. I wish I had read this one when it first came out, I was young and knew everything then. This is one relationship book I think every person should read. There were so many revelations for me in there.
You hit that nail on the head about it not her being LD as much as her unwillingness to do anything about it. SSM discusses how it is hard to not see yourself as normal, no matter where you happen to be on the libido scale. I view myself as normal, why would I want to let go of something that I get so much pleasure out of?
On affairs just put me in the validation camp. After going for so long without sex I was starting to question my own desirability (we had gone for about 3 years with annual or semi-annual ML). It was a real boost to my self esteem to know that I was still wanted by someone, even if I had to lower myself by an act of betrayal to find out. When you look at it, it is not reasonable, it is more of a compulsion. It is an act of weakness at your lowest point. The trouble is you end up falling in love with the OW. I don't recommend this path to anyone.
The job hunt is still going... and going... and going... and going. W's had a couple of interviews now and may even get an offer soon on one of them.
, so I was using those things before it was even cool (70's). That BTW was W and my preferred method of birth control once she quit the pill (after D16's birth she decided not to go back on it). 
This is one relationship book I think every person should read. There were so many revelations for me in there.
