Sure it would have hurt if he had turned to tail and run again but I had already survived to worst hurt of my life so I was ready either way.
Sandy--That sums it up entirely. I have had so many bombs that I feel like a veteran! Of marriage, anyway...I have been through this long enough, Kalni once told her husband "You can't scare me anymore", meaning she wasn't afraid of losing him. I am at that point now. I still don't want to lose him, but my eyes are wide open to that possibility. And if me being ME makes him run, then he isn't capable of being the husband I want in my life.
Last night H and I were hanging out and we both fell asleep in the living room, me on the floor, him on the couch. I woke up at 1 am and went to bed. I shook H and he said he was coming. The prior two nights he had slept with me. At 5 our son woke up and came in crying, H was still on the couch. I put S back in his own bed. Then H came in around 5:40 and lay next to me. I rolled up against him (my back to his chest) to 'spoon' him and he put his arm around me. Small thing to notice but it was him reaching for me instead of the other way around for a change...
Gotta go, want to keep my 'being productive at work' goal going!
