Today his words echo in my head "I was a jerk to believe you changed"... Telling me why on earth did I want to start a convo in the evening, telling me he "has nothing else to tell me"...
I am hurt. I thought he could understand what he caused. I thought he would care enough to "take care of me", to try and reassure me little by little, make me feel at ease...
((((((((Kalni))))))) I have to say, this really struck me, too. It seems to me that he is thinking that you are the only one that needed to change, that he is fine just as he is. I still don't think he gets it. I don't think he has taken any responsibility for the hurt that he has caused, or for any of his actions.
I'm thinking (maybe hoping is the right word) that he realtionship with the OW was an EA. I think a lot of men don't even have a clue that wuch a thing exists, in his mind if there isn't sex, there isn't an affair. So, in his mind, he didn't do anything "wrong", and all of your concern about her is misplaced. Until he is willing to accept that an EA is just as much an A as a PA, I don't think he is going to admit anything. And I don't think he is ever going to do that.
I will say that I don't think he "doesn't care". And I don't think he wants to hurt you. I do think that he is very selfish. And that he is putting his needs (really his wants) so far ahead of yours that it is going to look like he doesn't care. And the hurt is just as real.
I think it might be time for you to step back, and listen to your little voice. What is she saying?
