JohnnyZ - I posted on your thread in newcomers. Unfortunately, I don't have much to offer, advice or support-wise regarding your situation. All I can say is I understand how you feel as I feel the same. I am really getting close to my breaking point and today am just sick to my stomach about the whole mess. In my situation, I guess there haven't been enough "crumbs" or whatever you want to call them for me to have much hope or feel like there's any point in hanging in there anymore waiting to see if he wants to work on our marriage. Hanging out together may have been a step in the right direction, but after 6-8 months, and we're still as distant, if not more distant than we were when we first split. Well, that just not good. Not good at all. And I feel our separation may have actually been the nail in the coffin. How did you word things - dying from benign neglect? That about describes it perfectly. When you're together, but not together, you lose so much everyday contact with the person. You don't call eachother about the silly little things you used to because of the emotional distance. You don't share funny emails anymore (at least we don't.) Everyone tiptoes around the pink elephant in the room and doesn't discuss it. Meanwhile, not discussing it is causing more of a rift. It is just insane. And there are so many other little things. We just lose touch when the person is not part of our every day lives. For my H and I, I think the separation was a big big mistake. I think it has destroyed us. But then again probably not. We were already dead before, according to him. How can a marriage be dead and only one person see it?
