Thank you all so much for your prayers. This is so hard & yes they are just like my kids. She was so special. I now think that she had a stroke on Saturday afternoon or Sunday morning while at the vet. She walked around & was better on Saturday morning but then on Sunday she couldn't even stand or anything. I had to hold her up to go to the bathroom. I think again, she hung on to be with me! She knew I was right here with her & I pretty much held her all the time after I got her home. If she had not died when she did I was going to have to make a decision & there again, she knew I would have a hard time making that decision so she did it for me. I saw how bad she was last night & I told her it was ok, that I would miss her but I would be all right.
We still have not been able to bury her, that is hard too, but it has been raining & flooding around here so bad that we can't dig the grave. Tomorrow it's supposed to stop raining, the ground will be a mess but we have to do it. I dread that too. She is wrapped up real good & I put her squeaky toy in with her. When we left to come here for the holidays she was squeaking it & had to carry it to the car & held it in her mouth when I picked her up to put her in the SUV. She loved Christmas & loved opening her presents. I have wonderful memories of her, she was very special. Now it's just going to be me & my other dog, without ex, that is hard.
Before the D was final & before all the decisions were made regarding the D, my ex had told me he wanted to know if anything happened to one of them. But now, I'm not so sure, although when he left he hugged them both & told them he loved them & missed them. The only way I think I might could get in touch with him was thru their email they have together & I'm not taking a chance on OW emailing me something so if he wants to hear from them I think he will have to contact me. I could let his SIL know but I don't think I'm ready to even do that. This dog was more attached to me than him, the one I have now was attached to him more than the other one but she would grieve herself to death if she was away from me very long. She loved him but she worships me.
One thing about this sitch, it has taken the focus off my ex some. I'm just upset with him now for not being here with us!
My parents have decided to go back to Nashville with me & stay a few days. I painted the bathroom sink in my Dad's bathroom so he can't use it for a few days, that wouldn't be a big problem but I think they just want to help me get thru this a little bit & if they are with me it won't be quite so bad right at first. I have the most wonderful parents in the world!!!! I thank God everyday for them.
I also know my precious baby is running around & playing with the other pups until I see her again. I just know God has to have our precious pets with Him.
Thank you all so much for being here for me!!!! Some people just don't understand what our pets mean to us.
