I think you see pretty clearly what he is doing; he is cake eating and hanging onto his security blanket. It's a tough situation b/c you still have feelings for him, but I think if there is anything between the two of you then the relationship MUST be exclusive. Neither of you should see other people if you are interested in working things out. But if he's not, then just let him go. This really sounds like an issue of boundaries. I could almost imagine myself in your same situation; I know I would ML w/my W if I had a chance, and I would love the time spent together, but the involvement with OP would kill me and I would feel like I had no self-respect. In my book it's all or nothing. Just my thoughts--I'm certainly no expert on M/R!
