After the call, I kept thinking of having the girls call her back and invite her for burgers tonight. I thought and thought about it and then decided against.
Good one! I think it was Puppy that told you something like you've never allowed her to miss you, which I think is true. It's like you act like the happy family even though you're really not. Probably lessens her guilt but don't know if that's a good idea. Yeah, it sounds like someone was there. My H does the family thing with my kids and the OW, and tells them she's a friend. So adultery and lying--great role model for the kids!!! Karen
My H does the family thing with my kids and the OW, and tells them she's a friend. So adultery and lying--great role model for the kids!!! Karen
The worse part is the ONLY people that believe their lies are them. The kids know deep down, even though they probably don't want to. Interestingly enough, if the situation were reversed and you (Karen, you too) started bringing someone around the kids, I'll bet it wouldn't be received well at all. Not that your would, I'm just saying. The different rules is something that irkes me to no end.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
[quote=karen43]The worse part is the ONLY people that believe their lies are them. The kids know deep down, even though they probably don't want to. Interestingly enough, if the situation were reversed and you (Karen, you too) started bringing someone around the kids, I'll bet it wouldn't be received well at all. Not that your would, I'm just saying. The different rules is something that irkes me to no end.
Yep, my son told me he knows his dad is lying, and I'm sure D9 will figure it out soon at some point. Corey, I agree with you, and you know your H would have a major cow too if you did that! The truth is they know that we wouldn't do that. Even if we started dating, which we probably wouldn't b/c we're married, we would NEVER involve our kids with that!!! Karen
I'm sorry you are feeling down, h4h. Just know that what you are feeling with your kids leaving is what she is feeling, too, when she doesn't have them. Will this be the life she wants in the end? I doubt it.
Karen and Puppy are right about letting her miss you. When you detach and let her see what it could be like without you, she calls and gets her "fix" and feels ok again. I remember doing this, too. If I thought my H was upset or pulling from me, I'd draw him right back in...making sure he still loved me and wasn't upset with me...and then, once I was reassurred continued on my way. If he wasn't mad at me, and was still my friend, I knew I was going to be ok. I couldn't fathom not having him in my life in the way I needed him. Does this make sense?
I still think she is getting what she needs from you, and living out her whims.
I was thinking that if my marriage didn't work out, I'd hop in my car and drive west on I-10 toward Tally, and . . .
EASY BIG FELLA!!!!
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I just wanted to see the purple dress, that's all, I swear!!!
Thats your story & stickin' to it, huh?
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
just wanted to see the purple dress, that's all, I swear!!!
Ok, but I think I look better in that hot pink VS shirt--remember that one! One of these days I'll get a picture of that and post it--just for you, Puppy! Karen