I really appreciate that...I often feel like I'm just stumbling blind through a cave...so it's nice to get some encouragement.
Best to you as well...I think you've been getting some great advice on your thread, btw...and the truth is, whether she is a WAW or MLC doesn't make much of a difference on you put the focus on you...My wife left, but she's not a WAW - she didn't leave me for greener pastures - she left me because she saw me as the source of all that was/is negative in her life...now she's go herself and her thoughts to live with...so hopefully she'll be able to see what she has to do - and all I can do if focus on me - making myself better, healthier, more stable - which would be just as important if she were a WAW...that said, I know it's hard to figure out what it best in terms of confronting her about the OM...when my W had her affair I did confront her - that was way before the bomb - and somehow it worked, don't know why...these days, I think if she had another affair and I confronted her it would just push her further away...so it wouldn't be a confrontation - rather it would be a conversation - where I would simply say...oh...I did say this...I know we're both feeling confused right now, but I also know that bringing a third person into this for either of us would not help the situation. We cannot work on ourselves or on our marriage if there is a third person involved. (and I kind of left it at that...though I said it primarily because she was asking me if I was already interested in someone who had flirted with me...).
