out of clever titles

[BeingMe]

I know how you feel, Hmama! I tend to be rather an independent person, and a giver rather than a taker. As a result, I tend to have friends who are takers and I see them when they need something. Even my family. My children have been so wonderful during this time of weird health I have been going through ... meaning, I rely on them rather than on those outside my immediate family. Thank goodness they are old enough otherwise I'm not sure what I would've done since H works away from home during the week.

I am in a foreign country, so I understand what you mean when you say that's how you feel. All I can say is that there are people out there who are like-minded, and you just have to keep trying to find them. They are the givers who are also finding it hard to find similar people because they just seem to be dealing with the takers of the world.

Not sure if I'm making sense ... the meds mucks with my brain sometimes, Ugh! So, I sometimes go in circles with my thoughts.

Anyway, I hope you find all the answers to your questions in the New Year.

Take care. ((((((love ya)))))

[Andabelle]

Sorry you are so isolated, Hooz. I complained to my H recently (I know, bad DB, but I don't think I'm DBing anymore anyway) that he had lots of pals, but no one ever calls me. He said I had lots of people who care for me. I replied, so where are they? He said they feel awkward and don't know what to say to me, so they call HIM to ask after me. WTF?!

I wish I lived nearer to you, dear.

[goldeylox]

((Mama)) and (((D12)))
After sitting alone (self-imposed) for Christmas, I've decided to go back to basics, reach out a bit more. Like you, asking for help (attention, etc.) is not in my comfort zone, but my C reminded me that I should not deprive others of the joy of giving, especially during this, my time of need.
Sitting here spinning my wheels isn't helping.
Good that your STBX is helping financially.
Giant New Years hugs to you both, love, Goldey

[hoosiermama]

H just called to wish D12 Happy New Year (not me, of course)--from OW's phone. That's just tacky.

[brandnewday]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!

[poet]

Happy New Year, Hoos!

[hoosiermama]

Thank you. I know I'm not alone in saying that 2008 was the worst year of my life. I was happy for it to be over. I'm looking forward to a better year in 2009.

[ThinkingItThru]

I had a thought the other day when I read your post, but I didn't know how to communicate it.

I was listening to Dr Robin Smith on Oprah today and she said exactly what I was thinking. And that is that churches and organizations like that often attract "broken" people who are in denial. So we can nurture and help them, but when we turn to them for support they simply can't do it. Its not that they won't, but they are "broken" so they simply aren't able.

Its not you at all. You're the one who can and does give everything. They simply can't reciprocate. I think I saw someone mention attending or starting a support group earlier in the thread. That might be the best idea ever.

[hoosiermama]

I have to share some sad news. I lost my 17-year-old dog Max yesterday. He had been relatively healthy--a "tough old bird" we called him--until a few weeks ago when he began a slow decline. Over the weekend he was worse, and yesterday was unable to stand, ending up lying in his own mess. I think that's how he told me it was over, so we went to the vet and he passed peacefully with the very first anesthetic injection. I think we would have probably lived only another hour or so anyway. D12 and H were both there--she was with him when it became obvious that Max was actively dying. She's devastated, having had Max her whole life. We have 3 others (yes, we're a little crazy) and they're even feeling the difference.

Max was a dog's dog. He was a shepherd mix who was dumped in front of the downtown building where I worked in 1992 during rush hour, and I took him home so he'd be safe until I could find him a good home; the rest, of course, is history. He was never any trouble at all, and was blind and almost deaf at the end--altho those things didn't really seem to bother him too much. He saw and helped foster numerous rescue dogs, and outlived several other pets; he was with me before I got married and even outlived that. I miss his furry presence, but I know that he is now running free, without arthritis to hinder him, seeing, hearing and smelling things as he used to. I knew this day would come, and I am just so thankful to have had him for 16 years.

[NNP1965]

(((hm)))