For me. Part of it was the guilt. Part of it was thinking he deserved someone who could be faithful. Part of it was not knowing what I wanted and just needing some space.
I still feel a lot of guilt. But coming here, and telling everything I've told, and being willing to tell anyone who wants to understand...is part of healing for me. He does deserve someone who can be faithful. HE DESERVES ME TO BE FAITHFUL. And now that I've had some serious space, and want my marriage to work, he needs some serious space. And I just have to be okay with that.
I have wondered, and you have brought up part of it with your question, so I will ask the other half of it. How do the betrayed spouses handle it? What I mean is, how do you go back to your friends and your family, (who are probably telling you that you are crazy and to leave the unfaithful one) and say "no. my marriage is worth more than that." How do you handle all the talk behind your back and even probably some to your face? I'm not sure my H will be able to be that strong?
How do you do it? How do others do it?
I ordered the book "Not Just Friends", but it's not here yet and some perspective would be nice.
Sorry you are in this stitch.
Mel
"Standing knee deep in a river and dying of thirst."
