Thanks that was excellent. Yeah I know I'll never understand it all, and most likely, I will be content with that. My W's mind is like that, she will stay firm until a brick wall falls on her to prove her wrong, she at least has that part of her still alive in there. No she is an alien, and yes, that's what I said to my son, him showing up with her to pick up D17 was classless. It was, but this wlk is allowing me to walk away from it without reliving the thought. It is a hard walk, but well worth it. I know that I will have to do things if/when OM is gone to show her the light. First we will have to become friends, then I will show her I want to trust her but she will have to show me a real desire to come back. Its a lot right now. I believe I am a really good person and I have said it more than once, at the end of the day, someone is going to end up with a real good man. I never needed to be more affectionate, I always was, it was her not showing that part. Drinking on both our parts didn't help us with this situatilon, I have stopped and seen the damge it caused and is causing because she continuees with the "where's the next party mentallity". Again, she'll have to look at that car everyday for god knows how long and remind herself where she is heading.

I like me, I don't mind being alone, sometimes even want to be alone, just to relax in my house and enjoy my surroundings. I have friends that are both of our firnds and I now have friends that don't know her, don't care to know her and I 'm good with that. Met a nice woman in church this morning who was with her daughter. they were playing peek a boo with my grandson, kids a babe magnet. Anyway she is very nice and asked where I have been. I told her I have been here every Sundasy. she said the last two we didn't see you. I told her I was sitting more up front. Nice to know that you are noticed when you are somewhere, and flattered to know you were missed. No, no romance there. Just a really nice woman. Who knows, if this doesn't work out with me and H, my next companion could very well be someone from church...God and his mysterious ways, but I have faith and the belief that He is leading me in the direction He wants me to go and I believe it includes her, for now. Until OM is gone, there is no chance for me. Sad thing is, if he is around too long, when she finally rids herself of him, there is no guarantee I'll be in the same frame of mind, sad, so i try to think about it.