Time for ME to change...scared as hell...

[theotherhalf]

thanks all,

and an2m, there is no more sex between H and I. last time he asked I said..."not until I am able to be in your heart, not just in your bed"

[Cinderellaman]

thanks all,

and an2m, there is no more sex between H and I. last time he asked I said..."not until I am able to be in your heart, not just in your bed"

Good for you TOH !

[theotherhalf]

hey Cinders, long time no hear. I hope all is well with you.

everyone, I didn't see or hear from H. Typical today H, avoid things completely and they will go away. I really wonder what he thought when he read his texts today when he was sober.

Oh well, on to better things...

I painted this morning and you should see the dome clock I painted...:)

[Cinderellaman]

hey Cinders, long time no hear. I hope all is well with you.

All is good thank you ! I mostly keep up with everyone's threads without commenting....sometimes however, I like to pop in and let you know I'm still around !!

[theotherhalf]

kind of doing the same here. I read people's threads all the time, but I'm in no position to give advice! I do come here to my own thread to get "stuff" out and vent.

Take care and wishing you the very best!!
TOH

[theotherhalf]

Stop acting like a 2nd grader and telling the man you hate him.

WCW, not acting like a 2nd grader, just being honest. I spend so much time acting as if all is okay with him and our world that sometimes I just have to be honest. I do hate him for soooo many reasons. Once in awhile I think he needs to face the music and stop pretending.

Last year H did offer to leave some corn here. This year he did not. I didn't ask either. Guess I should have. Anyway I have it now and hope it lasts till spring!!

[a new 2moro]

well id have to agree with WCW on that...cos we all know you dont really hate him, and you'd take him back in an instant fixed or not. if nothing else TOH be truthful to us even more so be truthful to YOU!

Be careful what you wish for when you spout off to him...you just may get that D you are so trying to aviod. see that NC thing is for you in that respect also

with his thwarted take on things those tm's will nothing more thand send him quicker to OW.

[WCW]

toh, if you got a txt at 2am from your H that said he hates you what would that do for your feelings for him?

Your H is not ready to face the music.
Even if he was ready what tune would he hear from you?

Creed wrote a wonderful post for you. For all of us! Print it out and read and reread.

Glad you got corn to be warm!

[itsy]

TOH...you have gotten some great advise from some really incredible people on this board...now apply it...it's hard I know, we all know but your making baby steps...stay busy for yourself and start living your life. Painting is good do you watecolor or oil?
Just stopping in to check on you, you sound better.
ITSY

[theotherhalf]

I paint with acrylics. Never really tried watercolor or oils. Acrylics are so much cheaper so that's what I started with.

I am making baby steps. Still falling down some but easier to get back up and keep going. Using this time to do alot of thinking too. Hopefully a little clearer thinking.
Update:
I have not called H.
He did admit to going to OW's Sat night
This morning I knew he was coming to hay cows, so I went to work early and was gone when he got here.
I actually put in 80 hrs last pay period plus 3 hrs overtime. HUGE for me in the last year and a half.
I have 4 painting projects almost completed.
Thinking of maybe boxing up H's stuff this weekend. Out of sight, maybe better out of mind...
Going to check on church services Sat. nights, something to do.