Cinders I think my H is the same as yours, he says he is happy and he looks it from what I hear.
My husband's word was his bond back in the day, he was always a good man, hard working and honest, supported us all in every way. A great provider . I think these men, just change and suddenly want different things. When we had contact he was always apologising and even said to his d awhile ago that whilst he is happy he regetted how badly he behaved then.
So does it help us to know they are happy? I guess it moves us out of the limbo and the waiting for whatever "MLC" to end. He has never said an unkind word about me and has tried to be fair in all the D proceedings etc.
I guess so much depends on the type of man they were before they hit their crisis.
Either way, I do believe we have to let them go completely and live our own lives as if they are never coming back. It makes us much stronger.
