see, I have to explain that she has her own domain which I provide the hosting for her and you need Outlook or some other mail reader to read it. Tonight I'm going to move it to another service that has a web based reader.
I knew this a month ago, you told me so. My point is why haven't you switched it already? Don't give her excuses to just show up at your place. Eliminate, eliminate, eliminate.
Just finished moving it to Gmail Small Business server. No more reason to come here for E-Mail.
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At this point in time Frank, I think the question needs to be what does she do that is not a game or simply designed to get a reaction. The game is take advantage of a good hearted man, the game is do what I want even if it hurts others, and the game is I don't deserve him to be nice to me but I am gonna make him be nice.
She takes advantage of your good nature, she takes advantage of opportunities to make you feel like the bad guy ("you said you don't like me being around"), and she takes advantage of your children as an excuse to enter your home. It's all manipulation Frank, and very easy to see from this side of the fence......
Just finished moving it to Gmail Small Business server. No more reason to come here for E-Mail. ;\)
Fantastic, very proud of you......
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But why? She is 'gone'.
Because you are the Yin.... she is the Yang. You represent stability in an otherwise chaotic life and she absolutely hates that. We talked the other night about her desire to make you the bad guy. She does this to help herself see you as something other than what you are. It doesn't make sense to walk away from a good man, a loving father, and a great provider. It makes sense however to walk away from an assholeeee......
She does this to help herself see you as something other than what you are. It doesn't make sense to walk away from a good man, a loving father, and a great provider. It makes sense however to walk away from an assholeeee......
Why does it have to make sense? She has convinced herself that this is what her life needs to be.
She does this to help herself see you as something other than what you are. It doesn't make sense to walk away from a good man, a loving father, and a great provider. It makes sense however to walk away from an assholeeee......
Why does it have to make sense? She has convinced herself that this is what her life needs to be.
Boy, you just need to look at it from the same aspect no matter what don't you my friend?
The fact is that it does have to make sense to her. It is just reality that it's easier if you are a bad guy. You see you always just want to approach it from a non emotional, feelingless, and inhuman pov because for you it doesnt make any sense so you desensitize it. It's always about emotion Frank....always.......
The fact is that it does have to make sense to her. It is just reality that it's easier if you are a bad guy. You see you always just want to approach it from a non emotional, feelingless, and inhuman pov because for you it doesnt make any sense so you desensitize it. It's always about emotion Frank....always.......
So are you suggesting that she is still struggling with her decisions? She doesn't seem to be.
The fact is that it does have to make sense to her. It is just reality that it's easier if you are a bad guy. You see you always just want to approach it from a non emotional, feelingless, and inhuman pov because for you it doesnt make any sense so you desensitize it. It's always about emotion Frank....always.......
So are you suggesting that she is still struggling with her decisions? She doesn't seem to be.
No, I am suggesting that she is trying to justify her decisions and rationalize them.
I will say that I did see her as she was leaving yesterday. She smiled at me as she took some boxes. Seemed down and I noticed she still walks with a limp from hurting her knee months ago.
I was pleasant as D17.9 and I were leaving to go for a drive and just chat.
D17 and I talked a little about the situation. She said that she sees W trying to figure out who she is. That OM is irrelevant, if it wasn't him it would have been someone else. She thinks her mom is a mess and that I'm more sensible in my decisions.
However, she sees no reason to 'wait' for her mom to find herself. She said "Dad, you really got to go and figure out what you want in life too".
And she's right of course.
It's easy to say "I want to be happy" but that isn't concrete. It's easy to say "I want my marriage restored" but that's not going to happen.
So, what I can say is that I want to be open to giving and receiving love without feeling that I don't deserve it. I do deserve to be loved and to be able to FEEL loved without feeling like I have to do something to EARN love. Like I have to please someone else to get them to love me.
I feel like a heel. I had to tell D13 that I asked her mom to stop coming into the house on school days since school starts tomorrow.
I said she'd pick her up but wait outside. I told her that mom doesn't live here any more and she shouldn't be coming in as if she did.
I could tell she was hurt. Not because of the change, but because of being reminded of the current living arrangements. I feel like I'm the one hurting everyone. But I know this is the way it has to be so that we can all heal, including W.
