A, You are still trying to analyze his every word, move, etc. You can't when a person is suffering from depression. You've sent him a thank you at Christmas and a birthday card for his birthday, that's all you can do for now.
They tend to poke their heads out periodically and give you hope. That's why you must keep your expectations at zero. Have you read any books on depression? Have you gone back and read the MLC Resources thread? There's a lot of valuable information there that would describe your h to a "t".
A, you need to live your life as if he's not coming back. You need to focus on you and your family and just leave him be. He will contact you again now that the holidays are behind us. Holidays are tough on all of us, but more so for those who are depressed and/or in crisis mode.
I do hope the new year brings you much happiness. For now, plan to keep the focus on you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
