Wow Trixi, its amazing how much your H continues to waffle !!!
I agree with NikB.. that he got spooked at your expectations after talking with SS and then, pushed back at you (in a really unconvincing way I might add!)
I also think, he was unlikely to really come back until you really let him go, give him what he is asking for.. space, time, freedom.. then he might realise that isnt all its cracked up to be and then he will be looking for a new R, but she wont be you. You are his soulmate, right! But he's having a MLC :-) Arent they all.
Can you drop the rope, detach as someone here said, let him have what he says he wants and see if he really wants it?? You have alot going on between you, with SS.. and its a bit unfair of your H to give his SS hope about your R, then turn round and sort of end it with you a day later, just as SS is about to go into rehab and could do with support and stability and loving foundations to help him get sober.. not more drama! That really struck me just how selfish and immature your MLCer H is right now, he is really only thinking of himself, to do that just as the rehab is about to happen.. and the smoking pot in front of his son, like you say, as that is not helping !!!
You sound a lot better.. I agree support SS, but step back from H.
