FWIW I made a similar 'list' for myself for if my H came home. When he half moved back in (as you know, unlike you guys talking all the time, we never talk!)... I was so darned happy he was here that all my "I needs..." kinda went out the window.
Only VERY recently have I realized (or maybe, re-realized) woah I have needs too... but I can't express them that well and H is basically guessing at meeting them. Oddly enough his cell phone went mysteriously missing at our party (we're guessing stolen - sucks, we've never had a problem!) - but anyway I kept thinking "Woo hoo the damn phone he kept texting her on is gone!" I forgot that this was a replacement to his prior phone when things were hot & heavy. He found his old phone and reactivated it and almost immediately went in, deleted the text history, deleted a "certiain" phone number... and told me he did so. I didn't ask, he just did it. When he first came back - I would've told myself a thousand times over "If he wants back in he better do this!!" but did I enforce it? No... not even slightly.
You guys talk sooo much it may be different for you but I wanted to mention that. You "sound" strong and you feel better writing this stuff down, and hopefully it adds to your strength - but if he came to the door RIGHT NOW and said "You should move back in Trixi, I was an idiot, lets move on" - would you? Or would you express to him what you need? Be honest with yourself here... I think you might be surprised by the answer.
BTW - your H totally "worked" that conversation to make it look like it was your choice for it to be over. He basically said it, made you repeat it, then backpedaled the whole thing. SS knows better, you know better, H knows better. Try to let it go.. he's being an a$$.
He needs to win you back. As PuppyDogTails often says he should be crawling through glass to win you. Not you groveling.
((((Trixi))))
Great 2009? Deal??
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
