How does he respond when you ask about his life? Will he engage in conversation with you?

Alternatively, does he share about his life in response to you sharing about yours?

You could also search your memories for things that were praiseworthy that you never told him. Don't overly flatter, just say something like, 'You know, I don't think I ever told you what a great blah, blah, blah...you were.' or something to that effect.

Couple that with any sincere apology you can think of and I think you will double the positive effects.

Like all D'busting techniques, moniter the results and go from there.

I think I would just keel over if my W apologised, sincerely and without reservation, for some of the things she has said and done. Things I have told her have been hurtful and damaging. Add to that a promise to avoid doing whatever it was and I think you will have his ear.

I know that my specific and empathetic apologies have had more positive effect on W than any other thing I have done.

Last edited by native; 01/03/09 03:06 AM.
Me 47, W 32,D 6,
Met 11 yrs. ago, M 7
Bomb 4/08/08, Sep. 8/10/08, Div. 8/10/09