Stage 5, Acceptance

[faithisbelieving]

25....a lot you wrote and I will try and respond as best as I can.

First off, the weekend ended with one confrontation. I slept on the couch. My W came downstairs and somewhere between 8/830, she sat down inches away from me and snapped on the TV.

New Year's Day....a day that we normally sleep in.

I failed.

I had a remote near me and I turned off the TV
Me: "XXX...when I wake up at 530AM...I try not to wake you. I'm sleeping.

She left it off.

Next, she makes breakfast and starts eating near me, smacking her spoon into the bowl.

Next, she starts a phone conversation with her mother talking at a normal voice level.

I failed again....I should have packed it up and gone upstairs. I got up...turned the TV on loud...then turned it down.

I walked up to her and her mom was on the other line.

Me: XXX....it was inappropriate to turn on the set while I am sleeping here. I don't know why you do .....yada yada.

XXX:Ma...can ya hear this? (laughs)

I walked away.

Buttons pushed. I failed. I can't believe how immature a thing this was that she did...that she does. I've been good at missing it..till the other day.

Later, she asked me what my plans were for the day. Then I got:
W: You are such a liar. I don't think that you can tell that you live in a lie....your whole life is a lie....and you can't see it. I've told the truth throughout and all you do is lie.

Me: XXX...your projecting...and I don't want to talk about it.
W: YOU'RE PROJECTING.

She went out that night and didn't return until the wee hours.

S'OK...I got the kids for the day. That matters more.

Anger...anger....and she just can't leave me alone..even when sleeping on New Year's Day. She must punish me.

FIB