Hey Trixi- Dropping in to say hi and happy new year! Sorry to hear how dense your h continues to be.. I hope you can find some solace in focusing on crafts and stuff you really love to do. Any new projects lately?
Quote:
Do you want to be married to a man who doesn't find family fulfilling and does not want it to be his top (or even a high) priority in his life?
I think this is really the essence of the situation from a detached viewpoint. And at any moment you can be the one in control, you should be the one in control of your life, right! It's all about what you want to do in any situation. So, time to think about YOU and what you want/need in life. No one else can take anything away from you. No one else can ruin you. Never ever ever. What really worked for me in my sitch was turning things around to my perspective. Like when my stbx said he didn't want the m, that was his "final decision" - it wasn't about him doing this to me, or him telling me how it would be, it was like well if that's how he feels- that's too bad, but it's his problem and his loss! Yeah, that's sad, but it's also like the toaster that doesn't work anymore and it makes much more sense to just go get that new shiny toaster now. I also want to let you know, (from someone who is dealing with the reality of having a final D) please don't be afraid to "move on". It really isn't that scary actually (like I used to think) and can really be fun if you get into tons of new and exciting things, new friends, etc.. It's also possible that if you make more steps to 'move on' and cut him out of your life, he will start running back to you in a major way and be willing to commit and act differently. It's your choice whether you choose to continue to leave the door open for him or not, but never forget that this is your life, it's an open book and it's your story-your story to write how you want, and edit out what you don't want!
DBer since 2003 D - 3/24/09 GAL and DBing for myself
