just a quick lawyer question

[Sophie]

H filed 11-10-08
my Lawyer responded 11-25-08 to H's lawyer and court
11-26-08 I received copies in mail.

Today 12-31-08 my H tells me he has heard nothing from his L concerning my response.

Is this possible???? Isn't his L obligated to pass on any correspondence concerning his case???

Maybe H didn't pay his L enough???

H acts as if I have just been ignoring the delivery of his papers by the sheriff all this time.

[job]

Sophie,
I think your h has heard from his lawyer and he's hoping that you'll open up and tell him exactly what you are planning to do. Then again, his lawyer may have been attempting to contact your h and he's been dodging him. I wouldn't believe a word that comes out of his mouth right now.

BTW, do not contact your lawyer, as you will be racking up more $$$ in the way of expenses. If his lawyer hadn't heard from yours, trust me, he would be calling him and you would be getting bills for the responses.

Let it be. Do not take his bait.

[Sophie]

If his lawyer hadn't heard from yours, trust me, he would be calling him and you would be getting bills for the responses.

I think I understand...but, can you resstate...I'm not sure who would be contacting whom?

If my L hears antyhing...will he contact me? My L isn't going to do anything more unless I ask him to proceed. but, if he hears from H's L, is he obligated to tell me?

Snodderly...do you believe my H has read the response my L sent to his lawyer?

[AmyC]

Sophie with the holiday it is not so unusual that your husband hasn't yet received copies of your response. He also now has to file an answer if the wording in your response requires one.

Last week one of my attorneys was on vacation and a response came in to the complaint in one of his divorce cases. I couldn't move it until he came back on Monday and reviewed it. Maybe your husband's attorney or his assistant was on vacation over Christmas. I bet it's in a pile on one of their desks and it will go out next week.

Your husband needs to chill out and direct his questions to his attorney and stop hassling you.

Just my opinion.



Happy New Year!


Editing: Just realized you said 11-26

Times up.

He should have heard something.

Tell him to call his attorney on Friday.

He still shouldn't be communicating with you at all about the legal stuff unless he is proposing a settlement. That's why ya'll are paying attorneys.

[Sophie]

Thanks Amy...It helps to see we are in the same state of VA.

He still shouldn't be communicating with you at all about the legal stuff unless he is proposing a settlement. That's why ya'll are paying attorneys.

I am unsure of what it would mean for him to propose a 'settelment'...

In his complaint, I pretty much disagreed with everything...and implied that we would move forward, if need be, on the grounds of desertion....among other things.

My H's complaint, I guess, was the basic...give me everything complaint to make a first step.

I think I typed most of it out in my other thread...I think you already know about all of that.

[Sophie]

I think I should mention one other thing...I don't want this to move forward...so, I hope he doesn't contact his lawyer or mine!

Mostly, I don't want to deal with the emotions of this right now, and I know my H has not given any thought to what this is going to entail. H has no idea what he is getting into...and I don't feel like paying money right now...plus, I'm not convinced I want a D.

[AmyC]

You didn't even have to file a response but it still would have went forward anyway so at least you're on record as disagreeing.

I was speaking generally when I said "propose a settlement" as in if he were trying to start divvying up anything, if applicable. At any rate, he shouldn't talk to you about this at all. Especially since you don't want it. It's just cruel. He's lucky you are even playing by the book and filed a response (not that NOT playing by it would help anything - maybe just delay a little bit).

I expect ya'll will haggle over the grounds for a bit.
Expect him to say the grounds are that you have been separated for more than year. That's generic. But you absolutely can respond (as you have) and then have that issue go before a judge too. Just remember, time is money.

What city/county are you in, Sophie?

[Sophie]

Amy, I'm in Spotsylvania County...L is in Fredericksburg.

One question...whether I responded or not...wouldn't it take a 'go ahead' of some sort from H to go forward?

H does not have any money for a L....his parents/family won't help either.

I'm pretty sure his L is a friend of a friend and has been on an hourly rate so far...

We don't have anything substantial to split up...except a house.

I asked H what he wanted...I mean... let him speak...I am very well trained to say nothing.

H said he didn't want the house, he doesn't want the kids and I to lose the house and he wants equal custody but doesn't know what would be best for the kids...he really doesn't know.

H has shown no interest in being a parent since BEFORE he had his little A and after that sizzled, moved out.

I am very, very tired of where he is...although I still find a way to empathize with MLC...I have learned a lot from your posts on Frank's thread.

[sleeper]

If I may.

Sophie,

Have you told your L you don't want the D? You can have your L take a defensive position, responding only as necessary. This puts the burden of pursuing the D and most of the cost on your H and his L.

My X would actually throw correspondence from her L on her desk and not open it. She asked me a few times, "What's going on with the D?" I would simply shrug and say I didn't know (the truth). After 1.5 years of separation she got her marital D but the financials are still not complete.

Don't do anything you don't want to do.

[peacetoday]

S
My H filed in may
I got served in July
my L responed in august and H L never replied ubtil the court set a mandatory hearing in november
that whole time from august to november i asked H why his L ddint respond
H said I dont know??
they were stalling maybe they stall out of fear as H really dont know what they are doing in their fog
Now after our court mandatory things are rolling along
we should be D soon
PAS MY L has said it many times to H L wife doesnt want D
H living with OW and not wanting to work on M
peace