you old hag, when is this thread going to lock? lol! it's been alive like ...forever!! Lots of hugs, hope you had a merry Christmas and may the new year bring you double for trouble, thanks for being a super friend!!
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
LOL...Thank you, my friends, oh how I love you all!
I'm sorry for not posting--my H came down with a nasty case of pneumonia the day after Thanksgiving, spent 5 days in the hospital, and was sick for a couple weeks after he came home. Throw the holidays on top of that, and I've been a bit of a zombie. I thought I could handle it without consequences, and I did okay, but I admit I ended up feeling exhausted and immobilized--longing to move and be productive, but the urge to just sit and stare wins over...does that ever happen to any of you? He's feeling a little better now, and so am I--I'm trying to dig out of that sluggishness and get things around me organized and be more productive.
I learned a lot through this experience though...about being there for someone who can't give much back. I think we both came out of it with a greater appreciation for each other...at least I have, and I kinda hope he has.
It has been a year since I started this thread, and I'm pleased to say that I'm a lot happier this New Year's Eve than last. I'd like to think that we're both doing better at communicating and meeting each other's needs. I still have to occasionally remind myself to just relax and let him be himself. I find myself walking an expetation tightrope -- trying to find the healthy balance between our individuality and our need to be better at working as a team. Maybe I'll spend the rest of my life trying to find and keep that balance. But that's okay, there's joy and discovery in the journey.
Oh! And HAPPY NEW YEAR to each of you, especially Cat, BeingMe, Phoenix, Deauxlie, Login, CL, ROOT, Whapu, Theo, BI, Red, Peaceful_Spirit...you've each touched my life so tenderly.
Hugs and kisses, and wishes for health, happiness, and prosperity!
Thank you, Aud. I hope the year 2009 brings you much joy, health, and happiness.
((((((love ya)))))
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
It's been a while since I last talked about H's repentance process, and I wanted to post a little update about that here...I don't think too deeply on the subject often, because it's frustrating and out of my hands.
So the other night when I found myself wondering about it, I just up and asked him: "Have you thought much about this?" to which, he answered, "Not really." Since I was really feeling brave, I continued, "Is there a reason you haven't pursued it?" Pause. "I guess I've just been lazy."
Okay. I think I knew that...but it was good to get it out there. And to step out of my comfort zone and feel like I didn't have to tiptoe around it. I think I've imposed that tendency on myself in an effort to keep the boat from rocking. But it has a way of keeping us in a holding pattern, and I'd like to keep moving forward, even if it's only an inch at a time.
I'm very proud of you. You have done the work to get to this point where you can ask this question and get an honest answer. Your point is made, maybe now he will think more seriously about getting busy on that issue.
A wise person is someone who knows when to move or when to stand his/her ground, when to talk or when to listen. You seem to have a handle on this.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
