here comes the sun.,...It will be alright

[Hope4us]

Wow Doc, too many similarities between our two sitch's.

I know as well my W is not in physical contact with OM. I don't think there's phone/email/IM contact either (but no way to know for sure). Of course, I just posted on another thread that I think there is still contact, so who knows what I think . OM moved on to his next victim even before I contacted OMW. My W just hung on to the b.s. he told her about them being together forever. And that's what I think may be one of the big stumbling blocks. He ended it, not her, but he never really ended it so she still hangs on to the idea that they are "soulmates" and our marriage is not worth saving.

I don't think my W, as yours, wants a D. She keeps talking about our future, makes all kinds of plans, is fairly open with me, invites me to do fun stuff with her as well as accepts my invitations to do fun stuff, but she just can't bring herself to open up which is what I feel is the one thing holding us back. Maybe she feels too guilty. Maybe deep down she realizes she F'd up and can't bring herself to admit that which doesn't allow her to open up with me.

Somber may be a good thing. May be a bad thing also. She could be realizing she's about to lose you and doesn't want that. But she could also be thinking she see's no hope for you two but doesn't want to lose the comfort of what you have.

That's kind of where I see my W. She see's no hope, but right now she has no better options so she's hanging around. And if that's the case, she's going to get a radical push soon as I am not getting close to what I need (just as you aren't) and I refuse to continue to live this way.

But that seems contrary to DB. Right now, if you believe DB, my W and I are in the friendship stage. That's step 2 in the 4 steps. The only question is, can we get to step 3 in time for me to still care.

I suspect that's where you are right now.

Like your thread title says.....It'll be alright....