Maybe I should be in piecing part 5?

[Hope4us]

Yesterday was kind of a sucky day. Went and picked up the Bakers rack I got W for Christmas. Also went out and picked up S20 a Steelers jersey (couldn't find one for Christmas, but found one yesterday) and got one for W also (she's wanted one for a while).

Had to pick W up from work as S20 has my car and I can't drive my company truck for personal, so while I was out it was getting close to time to pick her up so instead of going home and then back to get her I stopped at a bar/restaurant and had a couple drinks and just sat there wondering why I keep trying. Not a very good PMA, but I guess I just keep having these expectations that multiply with every good day we have that one of these days she'll tell me she's ready to try. And then when we get home she doesn't say much about the Bakers rack and doesn't really say much about the jersey other than "that size won't fit S20", trying to joke with me without saying thanks to me. S16 says "Thank you" as he's walking out of the room and W gets the hint and says thanks.

Then she was just quiet all night. I saw her looking at her private email account when I came upstairs from spending some time with S16 in the basement and shortly after I sat down she closed out of it even though I could see that she had a number of unopened emails. Just makes me think she's still in contact with OM and that's why she still is in her can't decide what to do place.

Just makes me all the more determined that when this move happens in Jan (that's when it's supposed to happen), it will be time for the "chit or get off the pot" talk.

I'll keep up my PMA until then, but its getting harder and harder to keep caring.

Ok, thanks for letting me vent. I'm sure she'll get up in a bit, suggest something fun to do today/tonight and I'll be sucked right back in, but given the circumstances, I'll just keep plugging along until the move.