Thank you all for posting to me!! I did have fun with my friend yesterday. Today I went with my parents to see a Great Aunt who is 95 & acts & looks about 65. I've always been close to her & her family, they have been so helpful thru all of this & praying for me all the time. God is with us, he just has to be!!
I'm sure this woman did brainwash my H, there is no other way he would have done something like this.
25 years, the only excuse my H gave was that he wasn't in love with me anymore. A person just doesn't fall out of love!!!! Anyway, he said that I tried to mold him into something he was not, he felt like I put the dogs, my church & my parents first before him. I wasn't working full time & he felt like he was having to do everything. All of this is so not true! I was there for him all the time, I always did what he wanted to do & everything. I talked to him about only working part-time from home, he thought that was a great ideal & he was going to make the little bedroom an office for me. Later on when he wanted a D he told me I didn't talk to him about it! I reminded him about making that room into my office but he said that I wasn't doing enough to get clients. I was but it takes time. All of the things he said was MLC & when he said all these things he had met the OW on the scuba diving trip & she contacted him first (I have the 1st emails) of course they did hook up on the boat but I'm not sure about sex, only about "kissing neck" as she called it. This was not planned, he bought me a 2007 Envoy Denali & a 300.00 leather jacket for Xmas 2006, he loved the SUV & bought it for me to use but of course it was ours.
There was really no other excuse, I know he had a choice but she really went after him. 25 years, I don't know if you have read but she even sent me a "thank you" for my H email & also for not sueing her. Does that tell you what kind of woman she is? My H always hated women like her, he always said they were road hard & put up wet. He fell into it big time & he was vulnerble, someone was giving him attention that he thought he wasn't getting at home. After I found out about OW, he told me that if you didn't get what you needed at home you went somewhere else. Deal is, he got what he needed at home, he was unhappy with himself & blamed it on me! I see it now. Plus last summer we moved his Mom into assisted living & cleaned out her house to get it ready to sell, another chapter in his life gone. I read the book "Men In Midlife Crisis" by Jim Conway & he fits it down to the part about the parents. He has always been insecure. I'm sure there were things I could have done different but nothing to make him leave like he did & have an affair. Before I found out about OW he was telling me things that just didn't make any sense, none of it was true but in his mind it was, when I tried to tell him he said I'm not going to talk about it & would walk away. He knew I was telling him the truth, he just needed something exciting to be happening in his life.
After the first of the year when I get back home, I have some New Years resolutions I'm going to work on GAL for me. Number one is getting a full time job, I hope in the music industry but if not I've got to go somewhere else for a while anyway. I have not been playing the piano for a while so I think I'm going to take that up again & get on a regular exercise program for myself. I'm going to try to start going out with friends more often. So right now that is what I'm thinking, hopefully I can do at least some of it if not all. I promise I will work on it! All this has just been so fast for me. But right now I still can't see my life without him, I could be wrong but I can't, it just feels like he is on a trip & will be back. I guess that is what happened the other night when I had a meltdown, I thought about where he really was.
Thank you for you support!! Also all the insight & great advice!! Sorry I wrote a novel!!!!
