I get to put myself to the test of your advice above, so I'm going to get on her and vent/journal and release a little steam.
W had plans to go with kids to the zoo on Thursday evening, but gave kids option of going to the zoo tonight with a friend, and having a "party" Thursday night. The kids chose that - it was all W's idea, and she is really good at wording things so that the kids will go for it.
I found out why soon.
I said something to them about playing the Wii for the party, and taking our two controllers to have four controllers, and they said, "Well, Mommy's boyfriend is coming." Pisses me off to here them call OM that. W doesn't even call him her boyfriend - they are so just naive, and think it's just something normal that is happening. Breaks my heart.
Anyway, so what happened is this: W beat on me and beat on me to get the kids at 5pm so she could go to the zoo to them. Threw the huge fit you saw above. Then, now that OM is around, she skips out on the fun FAMILY together time, to throw a party to be with OM. She worked, and let one of her friends take the kids. I gave up MY holiday time because I felt bad for W, and wanted her to have a special time with the kids. Remember, she called me crying, wanting to take them to the zoo, and make a special memory, and I always got to have the fun things. Gritting teeth!
The only thing that makes it tolerable is that there are a couple of kids and other friends coming as well - so for the third time, W is keeping a lot of people involved. How weird is it that I know I can go up against OM, and beat him with W - but when it comes to having him around my kids, it about makes me lose my mind?
AinO, I said on your thread that I thought W needed to learn lesson on her own, but if it ever goes beyond a group setting, I'm following your words, and giving that boundary/ultimatum.
