Hmmmm...would I want my partner reading my posts??? I would love it, if he were to have the big picture that it's all part of a process (i.e. something I was ranting about a month ago may be something I have worked through, decided I was wrong about, or just no longer see as such a big deal).
I do tend to rant here when I get upset and I think it would be hard for him to see the deep/dark thoughts I have to deal with from time to time. But, as I'm ranting...I'm figuring out the solution and getting good feedback from others.
Another real benefit of posting here is that I'm not expressing this stuff to anyone he knows. I would not want to be sharing most of this stuff with my friends or family, as it would cause more problems and discomfort in the long run. Besides that, I feel that it would be a betrayal of our R.
It does feel safe here to be able to talk out the things I'm feeling in a safe way that DOESN'T feel like I'm betraying my H or our R.
WOW! Shiny ... boy did I pick the wrong week to go on vacation! ... FIVE pages on a new thread that goes from the who's who of the bb that really got my imagination going to anti-D meds comparisons to that wonderful email from CJ to trying to close the gaps in how your intentions may get misconstrued ... really to much to comment on all at once!
... but on the latest controversy about sharing BB postings with S, I remember Jethro saying at one time how he would mention casually from time to time the kind of feedback he would get from here. It would seem to work for him. I remember a couple of references where in a discussion his W brought up something like "I wonder what your people would say about that?"
I know CAW is not comfortable with me visiting the bb, which is one reason why I mostly posts from work. When she use to see I was on, she thought similar to CJ, that I posting because I was trouble about our R which made her feel uneasy. I had explained that much of the time that's not the case and I'm on to try to help others thru their rough spells ... but she didn't seem to get any relief from that, so I try to steer away from here when at home unless she is already asleep before I get on-line.
Alas I printed 38 pages worth of posting (early June to now) day before yesterday. I've done so before and CJ took it very well. I just mostly copy over my key posts (not the silly stuff) and some choice replies.
He said he read through most of them yesterday (not sure if he finished) but I KNOW from having taken the time to cut and paste them, that there's really nothing at all there that CJ and I have not discussed ourselves, nothing that I wouldn't want him to see.
Sure there's always the chance that something might be misconstrued or "time bound" (over by the time he reads it) but I was pretty impressed by how little is on here that I wouldn't want him to see.
I think it's mostly helpful...especially all the nice things I notice him doing around here, that he might not realize mean so much to me.
I slept late (for some reason we both stayed up til about 4 this morning), got up and ready and we headed to our MC appointment. Went well....funny how we seem to work out all kinds of stuff on our own RIGHT before having a visit with her! ...Probably an unconscious response to knowing the appointment is coming up?
Went out for lunch, came home and got stuff ready for my nephews going away/birthday party (the 18 year old who gets to watch an orchard in Hawaii for the winter).
My sis and BIL really pulled out all the stops...tiki torches, new addition to the deck, mural of the beach on the shed walls (my BIL is a painter), flowers everywhere, Lais, tropical fruit, CJ burned a CD of Hawaiian tunes and everyone dressed up tropical. (Even my folks...they were TOO cute!)
Nephew J and his pal C were totally surprised. Not only was family there, but their friends too. Heck we even limboed!! During that event, CJ came up and rubbed my neck and shoulders for me (always tense)...then we danced and sang along to "Hotel California" in the tikki light.
Oh yeah, and did I mention that a good pal (a trucker who fronts a ZZ Top cover band) took me for a ride on his Harley on Saturday night???
As for husband reading posts...did you print out any 2 x 4's you'd been whacked with as well? So he'd see that this place is constructive?
That's great that he can read the stuff. I'm still sitting on the fence as to whether or not to tell my husband who I post as, much less point out that I do post.
I think he knows, but he hasn't expressed any desire to read the boards.
And I suspect that him reading Divorce Remedy is enough for now.
Let us know how he responds to reading the posts you printed!
__________________________________________________________ funny how we seem to work out all kinds of stuff on our own RIGHT before having a visit with her! ...Probably an unconscious response to knowing the appointment is coming up? __________________________________________________________
I've noticed the same thing. The first 15 minutes or so seem to be spent on catching her up on things that have come up or have been resolved since the last appointment.
Yes, PnT, of COURSE I included the 2X4's!!! He needs to see those!!!
Alas he's not mentioned it since yesterday, but that's what happened the last time too. Not quite sure what to make of it, but he's been affectionate although very busy with some assignments due.
Thunder storm held off until tonight, so we were able to make the last Summers in the Park at the Marina. Yes, August 20 and Canada is heading into Fall mode.
But you'd never know it from the weather this year, another day in the humid low 90's. How I managed to clean today...well I just chugged a lot of water. Also enjoyed a loooong watering of the yard (much nicer than weeding)...take in the jungle in all its glory.
Well he sent an e-mail thanking me for sharing the posts and asking for a chance to talk and "clarify" some things ...I wrote back "pick the time!"...no response in any format as yet.
Shiny
Just working on fall courses all day, kinda tired.
I think it is good that since he has something he is uncertain about rather than "ASSUME" something he is asking for the chance to get with you and discuss it. I wish David would do that at times rather than he just decides what I meant on his own!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
... FIVE pages on a new thread that goes from the who's who of the bb that really got my imagination going 
...Probably an unconscious response to knowing the appointment is coming up?
