Do you have a lawyer? If not, get a good one promptly. Tell them you want to aggressively settle this. Your lawyer will tell his lawyer that. His lawyer will tell him. Tell you lawyer what is happening. Like mine they may inform you that he's using bullying techniques on you because you still have a soft spot in your heart for him.
He's throwing blame, that's his frame of mind now. He had to justify leaving.. hence pinning it all on you.
Send him blessings, good wishes when he upsets and annoys you. Though I didn't believe it, doing that eased the anger so I was in a better place. That leads to forgiveness, which is a beautiful gift given to YOU.
Talk to your counselor about what you need to do to be in a good place to make good decisions. Mine works closely with my doc to monitor that the antidepressants I'm on are taking care of the depression. "Be in a good place to make good decisions." is one of my mantras.
Stop talking or speak of his actions minimally. The more I did, the more power I gave him, the more I put myself in a victim mode. What was I going to do? What were MY plans and actions? Focus on how YOU are going to resolve this. You are the primary person, not him. Take the lead.
Rejection, betrayal and departure by a spouse wreaks havoc in the soul, mind and body. I've found that by taking care of me I move forward. When I fall into old habits, I get stuck and feel lost and hopeless. This is YOUR journey now. What do you need in your life?
You can do anything you want.. The world is your oyster.
