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#168227 08/15/03 01:27 PM
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Zoloft gave me too much stomach problems in the first month, so I switched. No problems with sexual side-effect for me with any SSRI, so I think it's case-by-case. I think it's really important to have good communication with your Dr. during this time because sometimes you have to try 2 or 3 different kinds (or a combo like I do) before finding the thing that works best for your neurotransmitter imbalance and to give the least side-effects. I'm currently taking Celexa and Welbutrin--which works well for me, but it took a while to find that good combination.

One thing I have heard though, is that if you drink very much, it may help with an immediate anxiety problem, but pretty much cancels out the good effects of the anti-D's.

#168228 08/15/03 02:06 PM
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Zoloft sexual side effects were a blessing to me.

As one with a high sex drive, it made being seperated from my husband easier to bear, because I was not remotely interested in sex.

But, when I began weaning off of it...I noticed myself eyeing every guy in sight!

Heh.

Hugs.


PIB
#168229 08/15/03 08:58 PM
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Hey, Pnt, too funny, because I think the meds HAVE dropped my sex drive some, and in my sitch with a Lower drive S, I think it hasn't hurt too much! Never posted THAT before!

Hi Pam, No, I'm not a big fan of hot sunny days. I usually hide from the sun. Just been so hot and sunny there's not much choice here right now!

I used to be a big fan of the fall, but of late it's spring that gets me going. Winters don't bother me too much as I'm usually indoors. But honestly, I could stand a winter that goes from Dec to Feb instead of late Oct to April!!! (Some years we are "white" from halloween to Easter and later!! )

As for the weeds...yup there are tons! Trust me I'm not being nit-picky...I'm talking bit LOADS of weeds. Part of the problem is that last summer I had surgery in early Aug...and then when I MIGHT have been recovered enough for yard work...well, the bombs started dropping and kind of nixed my motivation.

We have let's see, a big square perrennial bed in the back off the deck, about 15 feet of raspberry bushes, two vegetable beds, an herb garden, two more perrennial/annual beds along the side of the house, another large triangular perrenial bed in the front yard, more perrenials (mostly ferns) under our living room window, and bushes/ground cover under our dining room window. Two 50 foot blue spruce trees, an elm tree, a Linden tree, a half dead male apple tree which is basically a bird feeder mount now, two flowering oriental crab trees and a massive maple tree. (true Canadian...eh?).. IMAGINE the raking...hmmm..maybe THAT's why fall isn't my fav any more!

Okay, just yakked at my sis and lost my train of thought...Oh, yes, had this e-mail waiting for me when I got home today:
Hi babe,

Things have been going well with us, but I don't want
you to think that I am not sorry for what I have done.
I am so sorry. I won't ask you for forgiveness, not
yet anyways, because I cannot forgive myself for what
I had done. It is difficult to weave an "im sorry"
into our daily conversations, so I thought I would
send you an e-mail.

I love you and look forward to seeing you later today.
Hope your exam went well.

Love CJ
XOXOXOXO



....I didn't even notice the "hi babe" (what he called OW too ) until now. Another one of those unconscious things that I USED to notice a lot and let bother me, but not so much now. It DOES get easier people!!!!

But I'll bet Jethro and Brian would say, sure it does, when your S is clearly making an effort AND showing remorse!! True, true...I AM incredibly happy about that.

I responded with an e-mail that I neglected to save. Thanked him for the "I'm sorry" (said WOW!! THANK YOU!!! ). I did say that where "I'm sorry" MIGHT fit in in daily life, is for example when I had my "moment" during our drive the other week, when memories from last year at this time "bummed me out". I did mention that some "yucky" anniversaries ARE coming up. But frankly, I'm hoping for NO drama on those days (on my part). Honestly, right now I can't REMEMBER if bomb #1 was the 22nd or the 23rd. I'm seriously thinking of NOT looking it up. I tend to remember and "celebrate" , the actual day of the week vs the date per se. I do know it was a Friday. So maybe a plan for something nice and fun or nice and romantic for next friday would be good.

Also addressed the forgiveness thing in this manner: Mentioned that it seems that for some of us on the bb forgiveness comes in bits and pieces and some things I'm finding easier to forgive than others. But I AM getting there and us getting along well is helping, as are the e-mails. I told him I hope it's the same for him with self-forgiveness. (getting there!)

What do you all think???

Shiny






#168230 08/15/03 09:05 PM
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Shinybear,

I think what you and H said are great! I agree about forgiveness. I think that forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Letting go gives you peace. I think having faith in God allows forgiveness to occur sooner/easier.

Have a great weekend. nik

#168231 08/15/03 09:13 PM
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You lucky B****

Brian

#168232 08/15/03 09:18 PM
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Shiny,

OK, now that I got that out of my system, let me just echo your "WOW".
Quoting CJ:
Hi babe,

Things have been going well with us, but I don't want
you to think that I am not sorry for what I have done.
I am so sorry. I won't ask you for forgiveness, not
yet anyways, because I cannot forgive myself for what
I had done. It is difficult to weave an "im sorry"
into our daily conversations, so I thought I would
send you an e-mail.

I love you and look forward to seeing you later today.
Hope your exam went well.

Love CJ
XOXOXOXO
Guess it would be too obvious to copy this and tape it to my W's pillow. Yeah, thought so. Hoping and praying for the day when I get something remotely similar.

Congratulations. This is so very cool.

Brian

#168233 08/15/03 09:25 PM
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Quote:

But I'll bet Jethro and Brian would say, sure it does, when your S is clearly making an effort AND showing remorse!!
Huh?

What a cool note, SB. How's that for validation? Has he done anything like that previously? I'm just wondering if it was a step forward for him...more than him doing it for you. Know what I mean?

Quote:

What do you all think???
I think it rocks!

jethro

#168234 08/15/03 09:30 PM
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Quoting eskb:
You lucky B****

Brian


ehem! my thoughts exactly...now I'm jelouse of both sage AND shiny.

so happy for you shiny!!!

LL

#168235 08/15/03 09:55 PM
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I agree, LL - jealousy is a good thing because we both hope to be there someday.


Bob
#168236 08/16/03 12:34 AM
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Shiny,

Just saw your post where you described the origin of Shinybear. I had to tell you that back when my siblings and I were kids, and perhaps being a little frustrating to my mother, she would jokingly say, "I'm gonna spank your shiny bare butts!". I think of that every time I see your name.

Brian

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