trying to be strong & patient 10

[karen43]

I'll try to let it go if possible. I need to keep myself busy so I don't catch OW dropping the kids off today! I've cooled off a lot b/c I was so mad at the time. Glad I've had the 48 hours cooling time! Now I'm thinking "oh poor sad H having to get driven around by OW" or something like that. Don't worry I'm not feeling too bad for him!!! Karen

[LL44]

Yeah, that cooling off period works wonders!!!! Don't even look that way when you think the kids are coming!

[karen43]

And now I'm mad again. Turns out the car was borrowed from a (guy) friend. So I was mad for nothing. Oops! S15 comes home and says I just got Halo 3 so had so much fun at dad's. The background b/h that is H had bought another mature (17+) game for his birthday. I asked him to please not buy them anymore until he is actually 17. H promised me last month that he wouldn't. S15 asked me for the Halo game for Christmas and I said No, he is not 17, he's not going to get it. S15 then asked his dad for the game, and D9 (she's a sweetie) told him I had said no to the game, he's not 17 yet. H bought it anyway saying it's his house and his rules.

Ok. we have always agreed to back each other up. If he said no to something, even with divorce I would back him up 100%. We have always done that in the past. I don't think it's right that S15 is manipulating like this and H is basically rewarding him. I yelled at H and he said well we had never agreed no M games, but I said yes, we did last month!!! He said oh, well or something. I just emailed him that we had always agreed to back each other up and not let the kids manipulate us, and I hope he will reconsider his decision. And sorry about his car not being fixed yet (they fixed it but it's still broken.) And they came home with a bunch of toys again. D9 has started to want a new toy whenever we go anywhere now, and I think it's because of the way her dad is spoiling her!!! Karen

[kat727]

Things aren't love Karen. You KNOW that. It is their sad attempt to "buy" their children. They have to realize that they will love them but may not respect them. Respect has to be earned, it isn't just given. Maybe they will eventually figure that out.

kat

[hopeful4her]

I know exactly what your going through.

The wife and I have always monitored what the kids watched. When S14 was approaching his teens, his dad was taking him to all kinds of movies(and still does)that the wife and I considered inappropriate for a kid his age.

He basically told us the same thing.

"When he's with me..." blah, blah.

They're just stupid people and are trying to be looked upon as the 'cool' parent because that's all they got.

They don't have the real parenting skills. Just like the wife. She's always had a problem being the one to say no, it was always me. Like last Sunday, she told me how S14 had asked her Sunday night about going to the mall with a friend the next day. She says she ignored him and didn't answer. I asked her why she just wasn't able to say, "No"? She couldn't answer. "I don't know what I was thinking" was her response finally.

Stupid.