Ok so I call ex h at his work since that is what he suggested. We talked briefly. He mentioned that s20 was trying to get a hold of him. I haven't spoke to s20, so didn't know about that.
Ex h told me a little about what he was doing. Asked if s20 and I could come visit. He said we are always welcome.
He was working, so he had to go and ended the call by saying thank you for calling, I love you!
More weirdness, but think this was more out of culture or past history than anything else. His family was always good about showing their love and vocalizing it. I think it was more of me like a sis or family member than anything else. Afterall, I had been immersed in his family for 17 years and at a very young age.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
Getting the house back in order today and preparing for the new year. I will probably take down the tree today and put this past Christmas memories away for now.
Not sure what New Year's Eve plans are. I am hoping h will be joining us. We usually just toast to the New Year with the kids.
H has this theory and belief that whoever you spend New Year's Eve with, is who you will be with the coming year. Well I better spend it with h then, since that is what he thinks.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
What will your h say if you and S20 went for that visit to see xh? How do you feel about this?
I think Snodderly also gave you some good advice.
Keep us posted.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
MWG I am sure h would not want me to go. I don't think I would be going. I think s20 should go if he would like. He will be going to Las Vegas in Oct 2009 when he turns 21. He will see ex's mom then. She lives in Vegas. Afterall this is his grandma.
I got the impression on the phone that ex would not be calling on a regular basis. He said he was returning s20's call not like he was calling really to talk to me.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
GG, I think Snodderly had really good advice for your H and xH. I am also glad for you that you ended up contacting your xH and that he and s20 are working on connecting with each other. I hope s20 is able to build a really good relationship with his father.
Ok h did not show today. I finally texted him at 6pm and asked what time he was coming. He said tomorrow at 10am.
I just asked for the future if he could let us know earlier since the kids were expecting him. If I hadn't texted I am sure we wouldn't have heard from him.
I find this behavior rude. Why can't he just give a call or text or something and say won't be making it today, please let the kids know or something.
It's just disrespectful. Not sure if that is his intent, but then I wonder why we can't fix things. Hmmmmmm!
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
I think he is at that stage where he totally forgets the day/time and has no concept of those things!
You think it is rude, I think it is rude but he does not. This is so common in MLCers as well.
Maybe back off from texting or calling him to say ask what time he is coming? He may see that as you being in control. I agree, it is disrespectful but to the MLCer, they have no clue at all what day it is, etc.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
I know you are right MWG. I am sure that is why no response back when I texted in the future..... I am sure he thought here Glam goes again. I am just really tired of the disrespect. How much can one take. How hard is it to not see how rude they are.
This is the part, where he acts like he cares mostly on a regular basis, but then this happens. What gives? Nothing like pushing me off the edge. Maybe that is his intent.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
This is where you must back off, I think. No contacting him anymore to see where he is. He probably gets upset and thinks you are being like a mother toward him.
You get my drift.............
I know you are not but that is the way they think.
Think of it as a test and let it be.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
I do get your drift MWG and I knew I shouldn't have contacted him, but I can't tolerate disrespect. It floors me that he acts like this.
I don't get it. Maybe if I understood why he does this. Did he just forget he said he was coming over today or what? I am NOT this type of person so it's hard for me to comprehend and my h never used to be like this.
Does he get better or is this the best I can expect?
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
