So what has worked/is working for you? Are you ignoring your spouse's affair with the conviction that the OW/M will eventually go away because s/he isn't the cause of your problems? Did you expose the affair and kick your cheating spouse out?
I am currently struggling with the decision of whether to stay and fight or simply leave my relationship. I don't know if I have the patience and strength to practice DBing or even if I want him back at this point. I'm just looking for some guidance in this confusing, painful time.
Well, I tried to follow DB to the letter. I lived with my H for about 5 months while he was having the A, and in retrospect I wish I had kicked him out. He was treating me with total disrespect and I didn't deserve that.
I don't know that you have to make up your mind at this point, when you are confused and all. I mean I continue to DB for my kids and myself, no longer for my M. I don't really feel like I have to make the decision about giving up on the marriage, but I know it's easier for me b/c my H has been doing all the work of D. I just kind of go along with the flow. I've never really made that big decision to give up on the marriage or not. I don't really think it was me that ended our M, and not up to me whether we reconcile or not. So I'm focused more on me and my family, etc.
