Thank you so much Sandi - I hate this with all my heart. I know W will look back some day with deep regret. I make it a point to speak positively and complimentary of W in front of D8 - the only negative thing I have said was when I explained to her why divorce and "boyfriends" are wrong.
D8 is just having trouble - W had been very devoted mother and wife, very firm about commitment/marriage, very much against people that don't stand by spouses - W has done a complete 180. This has to be confusing to D8 - also D8 in the past has sobbed those deep heaving sobs, and begged W, "Please don't break up with Daddy!" W didn't shed a tear, and looked at D8, and said, "I've made up my mind, and won't change it." Imagine what that does to a little girl when you pour out your heart in anguish to your mommy, and she ignores you?
I'm having D8 meet with a family counselor in a couple of weeks - I want to start the healing process now, and do everything I can. I want to make sure that I'm not adding ANYTHING to her pain.
Even now, with W, she knows that I suspect, and she knows D8 suspects, so she's getting weirder about it, but I'm still being as nice as possible while staying detached. She was sick again with stomach flu today, and I asked if she was OK, and needed anything. I will now not contact her again until Monday afternoon when she drops off kids - she may not even come in, her choice... Best thing is that I'm doing it for my kids - I would love to be able to say to them, "When Mommy was with another man, I stayed by her side, and helped her." I'm not going to SAY that to them, but they will figure it out. I am getting a life, moving on, regardless of W's PA or not. I deserve better!
