Two years ago on Christmas Day, I came to this forum to post. I came because my exH (then my H) and I had been separated for 3 months. He had come over for Christmas breakfast and to watch the kids open their gifts. I had hoped he would make a day of it, instead he stayed for a grand total of 2 or 3 hours. I was hurt, angry, and disappointed. I vented all of that here on the board.
That day, Bworl responded to my post. It was the first time he had posted to me. I had read his posts and was familiar w/ his sitch. I remember being thrilled that he had posted to me. We began posting back and forth to one another and instantly a friendship was formed. Soon we were instant messaging, emailing, talking on the phone, text messaging, and even making plans to meet.
Now, here we are...2 years later. We are now married to one another and on Sunday, we will be celebrating our 6 month wedding anniversary. Today is also an anniversary of sorts...it is the anniversary of our first posts to one another.
Someone started another thread the other day asking for success stories. While it is true that Bworl and I both came here hoping to save our first marriages, we were both unsuccessful at that. But, what we did along the way and in the end, was so much better. We both we able to look at ourselves and see the mistakes we had made in our first marriages. Mistakes that we have learned and grown from. And, even more importantly, we found true love...unconditional love.....with one another. As we have said so many times, out of the ashes of two broken marriages, a new one was formed. One based on truth, honesty, love, and commitment.
So, were we successful? Oh, yeah!
Bworl....this post is to you! Thank you for taking the time two years ago on Christmas Day to post to me. To help me through a sad and difficult time. To share w/ me your words of comfort and wisdom (as you do for so many others here on the boards).
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
And I admire both of you for the love and care you show the people here as well as the inspiration you provide to those who decide to move on with their lives.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
AmyC - I'm trying to find your thread. I've read some of your responses to other threads. You mentioned that you have been legally separated from your H for 2 years now - but not moving toward divorce. Even that gives me hope.
My WAW has legal separation for past 6 months with another 6 months to go. She likely left for OM who she is still seeing. To her she has to live her life and not look back. But is not giving me so much as a thought.
I want to know your story - because I feel I am following the same path.
You can respond on my thread "Second Thread"... p.s. why don't you have a link to your thread in your signature or even your history ? You can add these details in your profile under "my stuff"
Thanks, Jim
Me:40 / W:33 / D:3 T:7.5/M:4 D Day: 1/24/08 Legal Separated: 6/12/08 BF who sleeps over: confirmed 11/10/08 Suspect BF pre-dates D Day
Thank you all for your kind words and well wishes! I cannot tell you in words how much your support has meant to me over the past couple of years.
I have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams!
My wish for each person here (and I have said this before) is that they never give up on themselves. That they reach a point where they are able to hand their marriage to God and trust HIM to do what is best. There was a time when I would have loved nothing more than for my first marriage to have been restored. But, what God had in HIS plans for me is so much sweeter! While Bill and I may live in separate homes, in separate states, our marriage is so much stronger and so much better than any marriage I would have ever had w/ my exH. I had to learn to trust God to do what was best for me.
For newcomers...life may seem dark right now; but, trust me....there will come a time when you won't feel the despair that you are feeling now. I can say this to you because I have been there. When Bill and I first met, I didn't think that anyone would ever love me again. Bill & I had both come to terms w/ the fact that we would probably grow old alone. But, then, God brought us together! There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. There is ALWAYS hope!
As the New Year approaches, I pray that each of you here find peace, love, and happiness! I pray that God touches you and blesses you beyond YOUR wildest dreams!
Deb -I am learning....learning where to lay my hope. It doesn't mean not standing - it doesn't mean not loving - it means hoping in the fact that GOD ALMIGHTY is who He promised. That GOD almighty can take broken me and my little broken life and make it better than I ever dreamed.
Man oh man i am praying that I can hold onto that and move forward into His plan.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
