Another wife Hit by the Bomb #6

[Tawnya]

{{LMA}}} I hear you on the "do I want to check the checking account"..so, in a way, hub did me a FAVOR by taking his "OW money" I call it and putting it into an account I can't keep track of, cause it use to irritate the CRAP outta me to see how many lunches/breakfasts/dinners whatever he would be paying for 2 people for BLAHH..LOL..so..my advice, if you can help it, DON'T LOOK...tho..knowing me, I would probably look LOL..but I would hope I wouldn't..(I know that didn't make sense..LOL..)..but what the HECK..your hub told you NOT to look but that he hadn't bought you anything..sounds like he was trying to get you to get upset..if you ask me..so don't give him the satisfaction of that. I came thisclose to calling hub when he left tonight and being like, "um..thought you were gonna hang out with son tonight and play games"..but..I didn't

LMA..I feel so exactly the same way that you do, can't trust my hub about anything he says, he can say something to me one day and not remember he said it the next..it's so bizarre..told him I needed to record our convos.

However, when I just re-read your post, something came to my attention, re-read your last paragraph about "validate his feelings, etc" but I still have anxiety..WELL YEAH..because in all of that, you didn't talk about ONE THING you were doing to validate YOU..to help YOU..I think, my hub being a total jerk in going on that trip and the way he acted last night really helped that "tooth come out" on my detachment..cause like tonight..I didn't want to ride back home with him..LOL..I rode with my daughter and I didn't look at it as "thankful for the time he spent with me/us" (tho I was thankful for the kids)..but as "his being along is kinda awkward"..LOL..funny I didn't really realize I had thought about it that way until I read your post!

Also, when we got home and hub was in our room, I was in our other bathroom and I looked at myself in the mirror and was like, "I think I look better now than I've looked in a long time" so I dunno what my hub is talking about..NOW..IF you knew me before, which of course you didn't LOL, you would know how HUGEEEEEEE that is for me..I don't think I'm a supermodel by ANY stretch, but I sure don't think that I'm hideous either, I've lost weight, I look skinnier in my jeans, my hair is longer now than it's been, I'm happy with me..which is amazing considering! AND I hope the same for YOU..

:::Sending PMA your way::::

Tawnya

I don't want you to have to get to the point of detaching