Maybe I should be in piecing part 5?

[sandi2]

Hi H4U, hope things continue to go well throughout the holidays. I agree 100% that your W changing office locations has a lot to do with the "triggers" about OM. And, the longer she can stay away from any of that and stop any contact with him, the closer she will come around toward you. It will take her longer than you want it to, but that is just how it is.

As far as her not introducing you at the party.....have you ever noticed her doing that before OM came along or are you more sensitive now and notice these things more? I am thinking that she has probably always had things "all about her" but you are naturally noticing it much more now than before.

I have worked with people and gone to church with people that certainly can put on a different personality in different situations or places, so it is quite possible that she is like that, but I would not write off your wondering about it. Maybe it still has a lot to do with the "fog". I know it seems that WAW/MLC seem to blame everything on the fog and that seems to be the easy way out.....but trust me....it isn't easy. It is darn hard fighting your way though that fog and trying to see reality again. A lot of it depends on how hard she is fighting to get through it. If she doesn't realize what is happening, then she won't even know to fight against it. When I came on the DB board and started reading about the symptons of MLC and even though I was past what was considered mid-life in age......I still had all the signs, so after everything I read, I started (eventually) trying to dig my way through the fog. At times, I did not want to, but with people here that did not give up on me....I have finally made it and can think better and see reality. That is what is scary--is to think how blind I was to reality and so caught up in my own fantasy.

Anyway, I hope by the time you get ready to move, she will have changed her mind and will go also. The fact that she is talking about a future together, I think, is a good sign. I am going by the fact that most WAW's do not want to even think about a future with the man they no longer can stand to be around and won't put on an act to even pretend to talk about a future. Now that is just me....maybe there are some that can do that, but I don't know what their purpose would be to do it.

BTW. just out of curiosity, have you ever been sorry for exposing the A to the children? Have you been sorry for telling anyone else? How has the R between her and the kids been? Has she seemed ill at ease around friends that know?

Well, just wanted to stop in and see about you. Hope all goes well.

Take care,
Sandi