Hi Veronica...going to take a while to get used to that...
The knot/taking care of others parallel is just what I was thinking...and the biggest tangle of my life is the one I've been extricating myself from now for a few months...though at first I was simply making more knots without even realizing it.
Again - what you came to by accident - by following your gut again - is so very fortunate...I've been thinking of detaching and untangling as the main gift I've given myself this holiday/year.
How am I doing today? That's a tough question to answer...I'm sad - but not depressed - sad partly because I had a conversation with my brother last night - he came up with his three kids - and, well, as with me and my sister, his marriage is a mess...though possibly worse than mine. He told me straight out that he's just staying together for the kids - but he is not happy at all...it was very sad to have confirmed - since I had suspected it in the past...Add to that the fact that my father isn't here, and that my sister is away - and that my mother is just a bit wacky...and it gets a bit tough to be here...But I'm going to make the most of it...taking my mom and son out to lunch now - to a favorite place that has the absolute best chocolate milk shake in the world...I am not kidding.
As for thoughts of my W...when I called last night, she handed the phone to baby and didn't even talk with him - and then baby hung up...it was after that that she called back but left no message...I just don't feel any connection to her anymore. She's become a stranger to me in such a profound way - that I don't even think of her as the same person that inhabits my happy memories.
My S11 and I are heading to my father's house tonight - at my father's request - to see his family - and have his wife and daughter see my S11...we're then coming back to my mom's to celebrate the traditional Peruvian way - with a meal at midnight and then the opening of some presents...
