I do agree that the LBS's number one goal is to focus on the improvement of themselves and not focus so much on their crazy spouse. Saving one's self and becoming better is the #1 goal. Saving the marriage has to be secondary.
A PMA goes hand in hand with this. I've been living, learning and moving forward without my wife for quite sometime. I guess the point I'm trying to make is you can take care of yourself and move on, being positive and having faith leaving that door open a crack just in case.
The odds of winning the lottery are ridiculously against you, but look how much money is thrown at that every week. I'm guilty of it. I'm not comparing DBing to gambling by any means, but it does make that 3 in 100 look pretty good.
You can't place a value on marriage and a family. The chance at reconcilliation maybe slim, however we can possibly improve our odds by becoming better, being positive and keeping the faith. There seems to be a common theme to the ones that do make it though. The LBS never truly lost all hope for any great period of time and they let go totally, turning the outcome over to a higher power.
