Time for ME to change...scared as hell...

[theotherhalf]

Try to remember, this journey is not about you, but all about him. He's the one that is searching for answers, he's the one that is lost and he's the one looking for the lighthouse in the dark

I know this, and I agree but also I am too...


I have to be honest Snodderly, not what I wanted/needed to hear, but thank you.

So how do I make that safe place or be his lighthouse without letting him use me and walk on me and hurt me anymore? There is nothing in the world I want more than to be the one person he can count on and come to. I love this man very much and I hurt for him almost more than I do myself and my girls. BUT I cannot continue to be his doormat or his cake or what ever you want to call it?

Faith in myself Snodderly is something I lost the day my H told me he wanted a D. And since that time so many months ago he has stomped it in the sh*t over and over and over again. Faith in my H and God is what keeps me here on this path of hopefullness.

So I let him go be with OW. My soul tells me NO IT"S NOT RIGHT YOUR STILL M TO ME!! This is what stops me every time.

I just don't know anymore. I am really trying to find my way but I just don't know anymore.