It's Complicated!

[glamgirl]

Thanks MWG for the shuttle service. I am going to check on that. The road conditions are not good, that is why we were leaning on mass transit, since they have a train that picks up from the airport and will drop her right near my house, but now that servie is suspended at the airport due to ice.

[glamgirl]

Thanks Snodderly, I have exactly 2 hours to tidy the house and get my grocery list ready and then I am going to have someone shuttle me over to the store or I will try digging the car out and try driving.

I think I would be ok for local travel, but I would not make it to the airport. I would need chains which I don't have.

For a girl that grew up in WI with tons of snow and ice, I seem to be a bit paralyzed at the moment. I am sure this is due to much sadness, depression, emotions that are toying with me.

Thanks all!

[job]

Glam,
You can do this! Think positive! Pick up the phone and call someone to assist you, don't waste your time digging your car out.

Your sister will be there before you know it. It's okay...you've been having some difficult days and when the rug has been pulled out from under you, you are going to have days like what you've experienced. Now, you need to step back, do not ask your h to help you any more than necessary. If he offers, thank him and let him do what he offers. Keep the expectations at zero.

Be careful out there!

[Upside]

(((glam)))

You have received some really great advice. Please try to really absorb it. You can't depend on your H right now so you have to figure out how to manage things yourself. Do you have a friend or a neighbor that could help you out picking your sister up or getting you to the grocery store?

I know this feels like such a setback for you but if you listen to 25years and others, it might not have to be. When your H comes out of his cave, act as if his not participating in Christmas was no big deal and that you and the kids had a great time. I know as well as you that unmet expectations can cause great disappointment but if you can suck it up, it may just keep your H moving forward. Regardless of what your H does or doesn't do, enjoy the holiday...enjoy your life.

Good luck getting your sister to your house. Maybe you should have come to visit her in CA instead!!!

I hope you have the merriest Christmas possible.

[glamgirl]

Thanks everyone for all the support. I am glad my sis will be here to help me. She has always supported me with whatever decision I have made.

I don't want to be sad and crying while she is here. It would just be a reminder of what a setback I have taken.

This is the 3rd year she has been here to help me through this most difficult time in my life.

It's time to wipe away the tears and get doing what I need to do. Thanks all so much for being here for me. I feel like I am back to the day that h walked out of my life.

Merry Christmas All!! God Bless!

[glamgirl]

Upside you made me laugh. Thanks for that. You are right I should have gone to CA instead. Get out of the snow and Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr cold.


Too late she is on her way now. The kids are helping and are so excited that auntie is coming.

[job]

Glam,
You have not taken twenty steps back. You've only stepped back one step. You will be just fine. What your h pulled is just a blip on the radar screen. Pull yourself together and have a wonderful holiday. Do not think about this being number whatever. It's a new holiday with lots of promise for the future, if you can let what has transpired go.

Remember.....no expectations! If you can do that, you will not be hurt and disappointed when someone doesn't do what you think they should. This should be applied to everyone and not just your h. The new year will begin a bit rocky, but I bet the road evens out as the months fly by.

I hope your sister arrives safely!

[glamgirl]

Sis is on her way. She said it is quite the adventure. She said the airport was a mess. Luggage all over the place. People stranded. Figures the ticket machine was not working for mass transit. She jumped on the train anyway.

I found someone to pick her up from the train station and also to take me grocery shopping.

I did try reaching out to h, since he promised to give me money on Mon which I was planning on using for groceries. He is no where to be found. It's ok I will make this all work some how some way.

I will do my best without h for Christmas.

[glamgirl]

Ok my ex h's sis from my first M just wrote on my wall on Facebook and gave me her phone # and e-mail. I have not spoken with her in 7 years. She just said how much she missed me and S20. She said she has been trying to find me for 3 years.

She said ex h's mom misses me too. Her posting just made me cry. It was actually very touching and very sad at the same time.

Just another reminder of what I lost years ago. Not trying to throw a pitty party for myself, but I am really hurting today.

I will be relieved once the holidays are finally over. I need to shake this sadness.

[Maya44]

Be kind to yourself and know the holidays bring on more sadness for us. Take a nap if needed to refresh. Once sis is there, you'll have your mind busy.