TxMom - how to get through the pain #3 post

[PositivelyMommy]

{{TxMom}} Amy is right again. Avoid him till you can calm down. If there is a chance, you can even say to him, it's a little difficult to be around you right now, I need some time to myself. Then drop off the girls and do whatever you like.(Why does he get time for himself and you don't?)

Remember, this man is in a fog, he is not acting himself. That's why his words and memory doesn't make sense to you. Accept it. Don't fight it. It's a fight that you won't win. So just accept it.

Like Amy says, you are not responsible for his relationship with his daugther (what my DB coach says also). It's high time he took responsibility for that part of his life. You can't protect your kids from everything in this world. I know we want to but we can't, least of all their father. So just try to distract, distract, distract. Plan good times for you and her, build up YOUR bond stronger so she knows you are there for her 100%. She needs that reassurance now. She will feel that she can count on you no matter what.

Regarding Christmas, if he comes over, that's great. Your daughter will benefit from this. Don't take it away from her. Your H will have mixed feelings of this holiday because he knows he has screwed up and don't really know what to do or how to fix it. Again, if he is unsure of himself, it's a good thing for you because it means he is still undecided. It is only when they are ULTRA happy that you have to be wary of since that means they are in la-la land in love with their fantasy world.

Reality injected into his Christmas is a poison that will affect his A. A good thing. Just look at it that way and your Christmas will be much better. The more calm, at peace and happy you are, the more he will be unsure of his choices. Another good thing. So are you really faking it? No. Don't look at it that way.

You are fighting tooth and nail for your family. You are fighting smart. You are using your intelligence to win back your H. TxMom, I know you can do it, babe. We'll do it together this week. Let me know how you go!